Seventy-Seven Times

Forgiveness is by far one of the hardest acts of obedience to follow. Not only are we expected to forgive, but Jesus tells us to forgive our brother seventy-seven times. Why? Because He knows we mess up everyday. 

 In theory it seems simple, God forgives us for our wrongdoings so we should extend that same loving-kindness to others. But in reality, it is much more complicated. 

Great hurt is usually accompanied by other emotions such as disrespect, loss of trust, embarassment and much more. To add insult to injury, the greatest hurts usually come from those closest to you. I mean, you can accept a stranger tossing an insult and keep moving, but when the person you work the hardest for and give the most to embarasses or disrespects you it feels downright criminal. And criminals should be punished, right? Yes, perhaps so, but it's not up to us to decide who is punished for what or how. 

What is up to us how and how long we carry the pain that has been inflicted upon us. But how? The first is by being focused on things to come, not the past. The scripture reminds us in Isaiah not to consider the former things because He is doing something new in your life. Truth is, what's done is done and it cannot be changed or modified in any way. Move on by finding a short phrase or scripture to recant to yourself when old thoughts surface. Give them the boot. They have no room in the heart or mind of a believer. I use "Thank God that was yesterday and it's over." This phrase settles and grounds me when old thoughts surface. 

A second way to help promote forgiveness is to realize everybody is flawed and finding their way. If they fall short of their own expectations, is it not reasonable to expect them to fall short of your expectations as well? 

Third, remind yourself that people don't learn lessons at the same time. For example, it sometimes takes loss for people to appreciate their loved ones. People who have never experienced this can sometimes lack deep empathy but in time they will have cause to better understand how life changing loss can be. Know that we are all on different paths, learning and growing at different rates. We don't expect a child to understand algebra because we know they just haven't gotten there yet. Know that it's the same for adults. 

Lastly, consider your own health for your own purposes in life. Reeling over what someone did to you requires time energy and other resources that can be used to fuel growth in your own life. Forgive others for yourself and for your relationship with God. Let Him handle the rest.